Friday, February 24, 2012
Oh What a Lucky Man
Author: Andrew H. Black
Genre: General Adult Fiction
How long it's been on sale: Late August 2011
Current price: $.99
Marketing: Email, Facebook, Twitter, Author website
Total sold so far: 14
Link to book on Amazon: Oh What A Lucky Man
Raymond McClure is without a doubt a lucky man. But the jury is out on whether he has found himself with an abundance of good luck or bad luck. A power failure throws Ray into a tailspin that ultimately costs him his job. That same day he buys a lottery ticket, and that evening finds out he is the sole winner of a $216 Million jackpot. Unfortunately he has misplaced the ticket. With time on his hands, Ray volunteers at an elementary school and an eight-year-old Japanese girl helps to quickly turn his life around. Join Raymond McClure on this roller coaster ride through joy and misfortune, incarceration and celebration, love and hate, loss and treasure.
First 300 Words:
Wednesday, November 2
Raymond McClure is without a doubt a lucky man. How his luck should be qualified as good or bad is not so cut and dried. The track that one’s life takes is a mystery seen only in retrospect, while the future is hidden from view. Is our life story already written from beginning to end the day we take our first breath, or are we granted free will, capable of changing the course of events? Does one decision bend our lives in one direction and another decision coax our lives back on yet another course? Is it true that a butterfly flapping its wings on one side of the world can cause a typhoon on the other side of the world? Can a simple common occurrence like a power outage or the seemingly innocuous choice of clock radio have an irreversible impact on the course of one’s life? Or are we destined to live the life we are dealt no matter what we do?
Ray McClure awoke with a start. His bedroom seemed a little brighter than it normally was on weekday mornings. His bedside clock was silently blinking 3:18 in big blue numbers. 3:18. 3:18. 3:18. It flashed like some sort of malfunctioning robot in need of a swift kick in the reboot button. He slid his watch from the nightstand and tried to focus on the face. It was already 8:24.
“Shit!” Ray tossed the covers aside and bolted from the warm but solitary confines of his queen-sized bed. Wind and heavy rain buffeted the side of the house as he dug through his dresser for clean boxers and socks. The power must have gone out during the night. His digital clock was now insistently proclaiming 3:19...
Vicki's Comments: I like the cover. I would suggest changing the font. But the image on the cover is striking, and I think it catches the eye, so I probably would stick with the image.
The description could use some tweaking. Usually when people say "lucky man" they mean good luck. I'm not sure it's working to say he's lucky, and then go on to say but we're not sure if it's good luck or bad luck. I might find a different way to describe what's going on. I'm also not hooked on the description of the events he faces. A power outage isn't too compelling. Him losing his job is good, I just think it's buried under unnecessary details. I might get some help with the blurb.
I'm not a fan of the first paragraph. When I start a book, I like to jump into a scene. I feel like I'm reading the description all over again, and then some existential thoughts that don't grab me and bring me into the story at all. I would cut the first paragraph and start with the story. Beginning with a character waking up is not recommended. Google "How not to start a novel" and many of the lists you'll find will include "waking up." However, it's better than the deep existential thoughts.
I'm guessing if you change the font, make the book look more professional with a cleaner, simpler font, and tweak the description, you'll get more sales. What do you guys think?